hour of the wolf.

This hour is a long one, things can become a little strange.
s'okay tho' - I've been to(o) strange.

Set the bar high..

may as well say I won't see you until Rembrandt.

Oh fuck.

trap

"in a curious way what one is always hoping to do
is to paint the one picture that will annihilate all
the others, to concentrate everything into one painting" (Bacon)

Hit a chord with me recently having been 'stuck' with the one
same painting since November 2008..
..I'm still painting it..
it still isn't working...

'Sunday' said she knows alot of artists who spend vast amounts
of time absorbing things..
.. and to 'be kind to yourself'

I want to be kind to myself. It is good advice.

I have forgotten everything or dispensed with it all, replaced
it with confusion and stress.

With this comes 'clunky' paintings that don't work and refuse
to be anything.. because you don't have a 'hold on anything'

I don't watch TV, I don't read books, I don't have time to go
out drinking and having a laugh..
I'm very busy...
busy in my studio, trying to work out why everything is no good
and doesn't work anymore.
even if it did.. I wouldn't realise it.. or probably hate it.

This has been posted to remind myself that I am an idiot.

..and I do need to be reminded of that fact or else I will be
lost forever.

Factory update;

"These Days"
(acrylic & oil on canvas; & built on wooden painted frame)

Currently exhibited at the Turnpike Gallery.

9th May - 19th June 2009

(detail below)

diminished responsibilities

Avoidance is acceptance of these duties..
..but for all want and/or purpose I'm still here..
the factory still stands.. so to speak..

It has been the slowest start to the slowest movement
known to mankind.. thus far.. (!)



..I keep trying to push forwards but each push blunders
a new horrible mistake..

and back to avoidance..

played with a camera for a 101 days till that just about
pissed everybody off.. (distractions.. & slow motions)

but;

I keep coming back here to post some random nonsensically
worded jackshit..

so, I hope that everything is well.

The other day started at a bleary eyed 6am with two meetings
followed by a long overdue visit to the studio and another
meeting (much more inspired this one)
and I stumbled home after 10pm..
..with a package that had confused me most of the way home..

and then I remembered..
I have missed this world and now I miss the lady even more..

where have you gone?
..and when are you coming back..?


Nightshifts and paperclips abound...

nipples, erect, lip pink.

click.