fourteen minutes ahead and bleeding

Factory Film III

~ aftermath ~

starving in the belly of a whale.

_________________________________________________________________________

good morning spider;

carbonmade

~ Click here for portfolio ~

I will repost this link each time I update..

sangiovese di romagna

having spent the last three days painting solid
from 5am till nightfall (i live in the 1920's)
and with little, nay, nothing to show for it
other than a single canvas of abortions...
my back finally gave in.. i hadn't realised that
standing doubled over for hours on end seriously
fucking hurts.. and all for precious nothing..

grand.

i decided to take the day off from painting..
my brother took me with him to collect his brand
new vehicle..

sat in the rather gleaming honda showroom i looked
down to notice that my fingernails where a rather
fetching shade of prussian blue with a hint of
cadmium yellow hue...
add to this my general designer 'pensioner chic'
i wondered how long before one of the employee's
(all of which seemed to be called miles with
haircuts costing more than my house)
would ask me to leave..

i just sat there patiently waiting.. drinking
coffee from a logo emblazoned cup that was out
of my price range..

i don't belong in this everyday world..

i belong in my garage with paints and trauma
and radio 4.

i rather liked my brothers new car though,
beautifully designed, looked like some kind
of 'h r giger' creation, all clean and mean
lines.. very cool..
if i could afford a car i'd have one...

on that note, here is a picture by van gogh
i'm kinda of in love with at the moment..



sorry, that was two minutes of your life
you will never get back..

Your potential... (leave it alone)

"Leave it as a locked door within yourself. That's how it should be. At least then in your mind the inside will always be palatial...Don't open the door....All you will see is one tiny grey startled cat with diarorhea sitting on a matressless iron sprung bed with its great big eyes meowing at you. ..While an emphazemic landlady untangles her popsocks in the background....That's your potential....Its not going to make you happy. You will be depressed when you find out how little you've got.You don't want to find out that the best you can do, the MOST you could possibly achieve...IF you gave it your all...IF you harvested every screed of energy within you, and devoted your self to improving yourself...That all you would get to is MAYBE.... Eating less cheesy snacks."
(Dylan Moran)

god's away on business

7am scratching till it bleeds something,
methodically screaming like a cunt on speed,
all to the distant tinkling of paintbrushes
in jars.. being smashed against the walls..

i woke wondering why the very few i could call
friends in the workplace have distanced themselves
from me, watering friendship down to mere
acknowledgement

this probably precipitated the need to drag my
crooked bent thumbnail through the paint encrusted
canvas, wake up you cunting piece of shite, do
something, be something you heap of fuck..

some pretty pictures for you, how nice.
(heap of fuck not shown)

isolater found on roof.

you are not supposed to read/write blogs at work,
along with social interaction/smiling and civility.

what did come as a surprise though was when the
button monkeys figured out how to actually block
them.. hat's off to them, it only took them two years.

i will have to find some other means of dragging my
weary soul through the dark chambers of banality,
you can't get away with reading a book, it is too
obvious.. at least with the computer when i'm typing
clandestine emails to friends over the pond it looks
like i'm updating the latest spreadsheet with the
crucial 'number of chairs in the office' statistics..

damn it all to silicon hell..

at least i have replenished stocks of paints and canvas
ready to dive back into the latest traumatic reflection,
which in patches is working at a good speed, some other
area's need attention, serious attention..

i have also received, by way of birthday gift, the manual
of utter corrosion i have been itching to get my grubby paws
on for some time..
it is a scientific manual for sculptors listing the compounds
and weights needed to make a paste or solution to corrode metals
and basically knacker stuff up.. big time.. groovy.

now, all i need is the substances listed..

potassium nitrate, sodium chloride, ethanol, sodium dichromate,
zinc, acetic acid... to name a few..

i have already found a website that stocks these flavours at a
reasonable price..

and yes, if you don't here anything from me for the next
10-12 years, it is because i will be at her majesties pleasure
for suspicion of bomb making terrorist charges...

so, in the mean time, don't forget you can find my work in the
latest chapel gallery exhibition.. .. go there now..



and postcards are available..